High sensitivity is a feature, a gift that sometimes overwhelms, overflows and makes you feel like a lonely island surrounded by an ocean full of pins ...
High Sensitivity was first described in 1975 by the American psychologist Elaine Aron. His idea was to delve into the features of introversion, suddenly discovering something very striking.
The introverted personality did not have a classic and common pattern in all people. In fact, today and thanks to Jonathan Check's research, we know that there are 4 very different types from each other.
On the other hand Elaine Aron, in her book "The highly sensitive person", explains that one in five people is Highly Sensitive, it is not therefore a feature within the introversion itself. Not at all: it is another type of personality.
Experience sadness or joy with greater intensity, feel the suffering of others, be very intuitive since our childhood, enjoy loneliness, be very sensitive to pain, light or intense sounds ...
All of these are traits that usually define highly sensitive people, who do not usually know that they are until they are adults. Until life, has made them see that they seemed to always go to "countercurrent."
Now, within all these dimensions, there is an emotion that PAS, live in a more complex way. We are talking about love.
How to maintain a relationship with a person who does not feel things with the same intensity as us? How to manage all that amalgam of emotions without losing balance?
How to face a disappointment or failure? We give you 5 keys to keep them in mind.
1. Love to oneself
Love, respect for oneself is a pact that must last a lifetime. If there is something that is true, it is that the highly sensitive person has spent a lot of time "feeling different", "feeling almost a weirdo".
Why do you take things so tremendously? But why are you so sensitive if nothing has happened?
It is very possible that these phrases are known to you. In the end, if for a long time we have always received the same reproaches from our partners and the rest of the people, our self-esteem will most likely weaken.
You should think that high sensitivity is not something you have. THAT IS WHAT YOU ARE. And as such, you must accept it, because assuming that gift you also accept yourself.
You may be tired of suffering, of seeing how others are going in one direction, and you are moving against the tide. Stop sticking to suffering, free yourself from negative emotions and accept yourself with all your fullness, valuing all your positive faculties.
The life of a person with high sensitivity can be wonderful, intense and subtle, because it is experienced from your heart
2. Accept that others cannot experience things at your own intensity
It is very possible that you felt frustrated because your partners did not realize the same things as you. They were not so perceptive, so sensitive to details, to looks ...
You know how to read in gestures, you take care of every aspect, you care about every word and every movement ...
However, your partner seems to be blind to those multiple details. Does this mean that I love you less? Absolutely.
Love is not always experienced in the same way, but that does not mean that they do not love us. They do it, but in their own way and you in yours.
You must accept that not everyone wears your same suit or wears your wonderful glasses. You love another scale, accept that others do theirs because love will remain sincere.
3. Manage negative emotions, don't let them take you prisoner
When a PAS suffers a disappointment, when he experiences a rupture, a betrayal or a lie, his suffering can lead to helplessness and depression.
If happiness and love are lived in a really intense way, failure is experienced in the same way. And the inner fall can be very serious.
Do not allow it, accept adversity, the existence of failure, the knowledge of sadness very early. Understand that life has these black holes in which you should never let yourself be dragged.
Make your emotions the breath of your day, be resilient. Learn from your losses
4. The wisdom of loneliness
If there is one aspect in which you have an advantage, it is in your wisdom of loneliness. You are one of those people who find great pleasure being alone, creating, reading, listening to music
You have a vast inner knowledge, you know how to listen and attend. You know how to spin the knowledge of loneliness, because in it, you are well. You are yourself in all your greatness.
Always remember that whoever enjoys solitude and himself is not dependent on others. He has no gaps to fill because he sees himself safe and fulfilled.
Choose the person with whom you want to build a life, but do not develop an obsessive or dependent attachment. Do not hold on. Do not lose the pleasure of your moments of loneliness.
5. Love by your side will always be worth it
Love is an adventure that is always worth living, and if it is next to highly sensitive people, it can be as amazing as it is beautiful.
You bring that sincerity that is born from the heart, that intuits and pleases, that knows how to refine happiness to the fullest and that doesn't know lies ...
Do not close the doors of your heart for having lived a failure. A life that is experienced from the heart has much to offer the world.
Source: http://lamenteesmaravillosa.com/
The 5 pillars of love in highly sensitive people (PAS)
