This page has been created with the intention of contributing a bit of Light to a subject as important and transcendental in the life of each person as it is the fact of having to face sooner or later the inescapable reality of our own death or that of a Being Dear
To face the reality of Death Now, at this very moment, with a deep and courageous look directed to the meaning that Death has for us as an inescapable reality, it can help us release an anguish that we keep dormant in some recess of our interior and that It disturbs us unconsciously.
This act of serene reflection can also bring us many positive things, such as a conscious rethinking about how we are living our lives, in the way we behave with our loved ones and with the people with whom we interact and finally realize, If what we are doing today will make us feel good about ourselves at the end of our days .
Meditating or reflecting more or less regularly on our physical impermanence brings greater mental clarity that will undoubtedly help us to make more accurate decisions throughout our lives. It will help us to reconsider our priorities and scale of values, will surprisingly revalue all our personal relationships and emotional ties and will bring us greater awareness and happiness .
Death can become our great ally so that we can get the most out of life. Thanks to it we can get rid of many absurd and unnecessary worries and focus on everything that is truly worthwhile .
We hope that the content presented here will help anyone who feels fear of their own death or suffers the loss of a loved one. Here you can find a positive, optimistic and pacifying perspective that we believe can comfort you.
DEATH AND LIFE
B garlic this title that we usually see written backwards, with " Death and Life " we say a great truth. And there is no possible Life if it is not preceded by a Death . We can see this in countless things every day in our daily lives with the mere fact of observing the functioning of nature with attention.
Clear example are the seasons of the year, we all know that after a long and cold winter it appears as if from nowhere a cheerful and blooming spring that stains the forests and meadows of a thousand colors until its period of vital explosion comes to an end to give It happened to the summer where all this boiling of life reaches its maturity. Summer also dies and opens its doors to autumn, a time of recollection that prepares us for the arrival of the cold winter again. This continuous cycle of Life and Death can be observed everywhere, at the dawn of a new day that moves slowly until its sunset and dies at sunset to be reborn the next day. We see it in the ripe fruit that falls to the ground and decomposes but not before leaving its seed so that a new tree with new fruits is born ...
We ourselves die a little every day when we go to bed at night and fall into a deep restful sleep that allows us to be reborn the next day with renewed energy and a new impetus that gives us the necessary strength to start the new journey. Everything is born and everything dies, this is something so natural that simply observing what happens around us we see clearly how Death is a fundamental part of Life .
This reflection on the continuous cycle of life and death can not only help us stop seeing the act of dying as a tragic event to see it as something perfectly natural that follows the laws of a nature of which we are a part, but also the most important is that it wakes us up to the reality of the Here and Now so that we can live the present moment more consciously. It reminds us that every moment, every relationship, every experience we live is unique and unrepeatable and that life is worth living fully .
Let's talk about it
In the western world, there has been a tendency for centuries and that still exists today in a large part of society that consists in avoiding at all costs talking about any issue related to Death .
This permanent evasion gradually forges an attitude of rejection that causes us some discomfort when someone makes us some reference to Death, so much so that many people have a great discomfort to talk about it, they find it unpleasant, annoying, as if talking about it he was somehow knocking on his door. This way of reacting is very common in our current society as a result of a practically non-existent sensitization on this subject both in the educational and family fields.
It is logical and understandable that in the stages of childhood and youth when it is full of life and personal projects do not feel like thinking about the final stretch of our life, its time will come, we think, and in part there is no reason for those who think so, but it would be good for everyone if we could somehow get acquainted with the concept of Death and Duel already of children tackling it openly and naturally .
When a pet dies for example, this can be an opportunity to talk about it with our children instead of avoiding the issue or minimizing it. Nor do we need to go too deep or use strange words, we can simply explain that death is another stage of life, that it is not something apart and that we will sooner or later reach that stage one day. We can even tell you with all peace of mind that after we die we go to a place where there is no suffering and where you are doing very well. Any situation is good to talk about it if done naturally. This attitude will favor that in the future this person can face much better the loss of a family member or friend and their subsequent grieving process.
The question is to break the silence on this subject already from little beyond the simple phrase: when someone dies they go to heaven, so that it ceases to be a taboo subject and we find it less rugged as it happens in many other cultures in which they give this theme the importance it deserves and where Life and Death are understood as a whole
Accompaniment
We understand by Accompaniment the fact of being with the person who is in the last days of his life staying patiently beside him even when it seems that he is not aware of our presence.
This Accompaniment is usually given by family members and it is worth emphasizing that their presence alone has enormous emotional value for the person who is in the final stretch of their life. These moments are so important that the same day of his birth, and being fortunate that his relatives are next to him is something very rewarding and unimaginable to his departure in a calm and peaceful way.
There are several types of fears around death, the most common is usually the fear of pain and physical suffering that precedes death. Fortunately today this fear is diminishing thanks to palliative care that manages to practically eliminate all pain sensations until the moment of expiration.
But another of the most widespread fears especially for people who are elderly and who in many cases live alone after losing their spouse, is the fear of dying alone. This fear is much more disturbing in his day than any other fear and for this reason it is so important that family members become aware of the incalculable value that it is for the terminally ill person to be with him .
In an Accompaniment it is important to keep in mind some details in order to favor an appropriate climate at this crucial moment. The first thing would be to try to be as calm and serene as possible, respecting to the maximum the atmosphere of calm that is perceived in the room. It is not necessary to suppress crying if it arises spontaneously but if it is out of control it would be better to leave the room a few minutes to calm down.
It is very comforting for the patient to receive a little affection through physical contact, such as taking him by the hand with tenderness or gently stroking the head and hair . In these moments, silence is what is most appreciated so it is advisable not to speak by speaking and in any case the most important thing will be to know how to listen . Very deep and sincere emotional charges are released.
It is not convenient to force any conversation that does not arise naturally and also not to discuss religious beliefs if the person in question has not had them before and does not express any interest in talking about it. Sometimes with the best of our intentions we try to give you a spiritual comfort so that you are calm and unintentionally what we are doing is rather to confuse or bother you. Now if your state allows it and expresses a clear interest in talking about it, then it will be good to talk about it and share our spiritual beliefs.
We can take advantage of these last moments to say what we still have in our hearts and that we could not do or wanted to do before, the words of Love and Forgiveness take their maximum expression at this moment, letting them out will be good for both of us.
Duel
We can define the Duel as a process of emotional adaptation that begins after the loss of a loved one. Each of us lives this experience in a very particular way because it influences many personal, emotional, emotional, psychological, cultural aspects that make any attempt at comparison in vain.
No one should feel guilty for overcoming a grieving process long before or long after another person, the time devoted to this process does not mean in any way wanting the deceased person more or less and each assimilates and externalizes in their own way. However, we can detail some aspects that relate us to the deceased and that indicate the type of Duel we face.
Emotional Link There are people with whom there is a strong emotional bond despite not being an integral part of the family and therefore the grieving process can be even more intense than with that of a family member. Degree of dependence The more emotional and emotional dependence, the more intense the process. Validity in the relationship . If with the deceased person there was a strong emotional bond but it was an old relationship (childhood friends, coworkers, etc.), the impact on receiving the news of his death may be important but the grieving process will be much lower in intensity and duration. Age of the deceased It is especially difficult to overcome the grieving processes when it comes to young children and very young people. Circumstances of death . The deaths that occur unexpectedly cause a greater emotional impact especially in the early stages of the Duel. Body recovery When an accident occurs in which the bodies do not appear or their recovery is impossible, the difficulty in accepting and overcoming that loss is greatly increased.
Psychologists tell us about 5 Phases or Stages through which the grieving process takes place although it is important to mention that although it is true that in most cases this sequence of phases usually occurs with a greater or lesser interval of time, it is also true that nothing is prescribed in this subject and therefore there can always be people who live this process in a completely different way than usual.
The 5 phases:
1.- Denial . This phase is usually associated with sudden and unexpected deaths with which we tend to be in a state of shock upon receiving the news. We cannot believe or assimilate at that moment what they are telling us. We do not believe it possible, it is as if it were not happening to us, often there is no reaction, the confusion is absolute. In this first phase, a state of acceptance is often seen as an internal and external protection that in reality has not yet arrived.
2.- Angry . After the shock, anger arises, guilt, we think of everything we could have done and did not do, we would give anything to go back and try to avoid what happened. It is a stage marked by feelings of anger and is not usually very receptive to the words of comfort. It will be good to express emotions, let off steam and take out everything that is inside.
3.- Negotiation . After anger and looking guilty, we begin to be aware of the reality of the facts and that there is no going back. This loss, in addition to being shocked, has created us a personal disorganization that we will have to recompose to find a way to fit the new situation both internally and with our surroundings.
4.- Depression . It is an especially painful stage since we feel a huge emptiness that causes us a lot of suffering. The sadness can become so deep that it is relatively easy to fall into a depression. This is part of the process and it will be good if the people around us and support us understand it and give us time. However, if the situation stagnates, some professional help may be necessary to move forward.
5.- Acceptance . This phase implies full acceptance of the loss and in many cases it represents a true rebirth as a person. Overcoming is not forgetting. We will never forget that person and will always keep them alive in our hearts. His memory no longer creates pain or suffering, but rather, it can in any case strengthen us and help us face difficult situations in our lives. We have found a very special place inside us for that person and we are ready to move on with our path.
It is worth highlighting the enormous complexity and intensity of the loss of a spouse or a child . It is probably the toughest test anyone can face in life. Feelings can be so heartbreaking that no one who has not been through a similar situation has the ability to understand what this suffering entails. Many people may find it helpful to go to support groups with people who have gone through or are going through a similar situation. Sharing experiences, feelings and emotions with anyone who has been through this can be very comforting and very liberating .
Religious and spiritual beliefs can be of comfort if we believe in the existence of a Beyond where we can meet again with our loved ones. However, this can be counterproductive if what is achieved is to distract us from the present moment and the need to face the loss process .
Religion and Faith
The history of religions is as old as the very existence of humanity. The old man has always felt very vulnerable and insignificant in the face of natural phenomena, anyone who has witnessed a strong storm with its deafening thunder, lightning, wind blowing hard ...
... it is something so impressive that it is not surprising that in ancient times these phenomena were attributed to the anger of a Supreme Being who lived in the heavens. Thus we have been thousands of years trying to please the Gods with all kinds of rituals so that they would grant us prosperity and avoid their anger and destructive power.
With the course of the centuries science began to make its way through so much ignorance and revealed all the phenomenal mysteries one by one. Parallel to the evolution of science, although much earlier, the great spiritual masters such as Jesus, Buddha, Muhammad, Lao Tsé arrived ... driving the spiritual side of humanity and originating the various religions that extend today throughout the length and breadth of the planet. In such a way that the answers that science cannot give us regarding existential questions, religion gives us in its different versions, although that is not about empirical answers, they are answers that require Faith .
And Faith is that firm belief that exists about the existence of a Higher Order that governs Everything and that has nothing to do with that Being that we fearfully worshiped in ancient times. To have Faith is to believe in a loving and harmonious Creative Force that we call in many ways each according to their beliefs, God, Allah, Brhama, Love, Collective Consciousness, Cosmic Energy ... the name we use to refer to it is not important, The important thing is to believe in her, to know that there is something else above us, that we were born from her and that at the end of our journey we will return to her .
It is not necessary to follow any particular religion to have Faith, Religion and Faith do not necessarily have to go together . While it is true that all religions base their creed on faith, today it is very common to find non-religious people who do have faith in something that is above them even if they do not know very well how to define it. The Search for our own Truth is fundamental not to fall into a blind faith to the teachings we receive as children or to what we are told that we have to believe since this would not be Faith, it would be pure Credulity .
There are also agnostic or atheistic people. They either deny the existence of a God as a superior entity or have so many doubts about it that they prefer to stay out of it. All beliefs or non-beliefs are very respectable, including those who also deny the existence of the soul. The Cartesian mentality does not cease to be another belief system based on facts and evidence in which everything that cannot be scientifically proven is excluded. For these people, death is an End without more. Whom this emptiness or jump to nothing produces terror, obsessive fear (tanatophobia), much anguish or anxiety, perhaps it would be good if he received some kind of spiritual orientation or to inquire a little more about the various spiritual currents that exist in the world.
The Search for truth through mental Reasoning can also lead us to the acceptance of the existence of an immortal soul that is not subject to the laws of matter and that survives the biological death of the physical body .
There have been several studies that allow to affirm that those people who have one or another spiritual or religious belief, all are good in this sense, or simply with the power of their Faith, will face Death with much more Peace and Serenity than those who did not have it.
Faith cannot be forced or simulated, it is had or it is not had although in many occasions people who had never had it before, due to some lived experience or as a result of their own search, suddenly arises a sincere faith that changes their perspective of their lives completely .
Beyond there
Then, we refer to what comes after death. To talk about it, it is important to respect the religious beliefs of each person, all of them are perfectly valid if what they bring us is Hope and Confidence in what will come next .
To describe the instants following physical death, we can refer to the testimony left to us by thousands of people who have had a Near Death Experience . All of them coincide in a series of descriptions such as the sensation of peace that completely floods them, their perfect clarity of thought, a great corporeal lightness and in the appearance of a path, another path. The one that opens in front of them to which they are directed with the desire of wanting to reach the radiant Light that glimpses at the end.
We have heard this hundreds of times and we do not have to doubt these testimonies since they narrate their experience in a totally disinterested way and that they also come from very different social, cultural and religious spheres. However we have no testimonies of people who have returned from the next stage at the end of that road that somehow looks like the prelude to something else ...
Let's see what the four major religions say about this topic:
Christianity tells us about the Resurrection after death. Jesus Christ sacrificed his life to free man from his sins, so every Christian repentant and acquitted of sin through confession before he died, once he dies he will be received by Christ in Heaven, where he will remain with him full of joy and happiness For all eternity.
The Bible tells us of an intermediate transitional state called Purgatory in which those who have committed minor sins not confessed or serious and confessed in life but without having completed all penance, must be purified by remaining there for a certain period of time suffering God's remoteness. until their souls are cleansed and they are allowed their definitive entry into Heaven. The living can help by prayer that these deceased spend less time in Purgatory. Finally there is Hell, a place where all those who die in grave sin without repentance and those who do not want to receive God's forgiveness in confession will go. Hell supposes an eternal punishment and no possibility of Salvation.
For the Muslim followers of Islam, the other great monotheistic religion, something similar happens that with Christianity although they call it Heaven and have no equivalent to Purgatory. Salvation can only be achieved through the mercy of Allah and for that you must believe in one God, in his sacred writings and in the Prophet Muhammad, but still you can only enter Paradise if it is the will of Allah . All children who die before reaching the age of puberty will be saved regardless of the faith of their parents and the sins they have committed because they are not yet responsible for their actions.
There are also the two eastern religions with more followers than are Hinduism, polytheistic and the oldest of all and Buddhism, not theistic and what they themselves prefer to call philosophy rather than religion. The two are very different from each other but both speak to us of the Reincarnation as a necessary mechanism for the evolution of the spirit of each person, that is to say that after dying we incarnate again in another body to continue to atone for our sins and sins and to gradually purify little as we develop and improve our human qualities.
This cycle of reincarnations will not cease until we completely clean all our imperfections and impurities and are transmuted into Love and Goodness . We may have to use hundreds of lives to achieve it, but once we reach that degree of spiritual purity we will have become Beings of Light and will be free from the need to return again and again. Only then can we return to earth voluntarily if we wish and with the sole purpose of helping others in their evolutionary path. There are also the Spiritual Guides who help us from another plane of existence and who once lived here as human beings.
These four religious beliefs are the ones that currently have the most followers worldwide. All of them have their own scriptures, holy books, prophets, teachers and saints that enlighten us so that we are better people in the face of the tribulations of life. That is why it is important to emphasize that all of them are good for the human being as long as they are correctly understood and do not fall into extreme positions. The really important thing is that each one follows the beliefs that give him a greater state of Peace and Hope .
Those who feel an irrational fear of their own death may reflect on what all religious and spiritual beliefs of the entire world proclaim, despite their many nuances and discrepancies between them. All of them agree that the soul survives the death of the physical body, that it is immortal and eternal, that we never die and only change state to recover our purest essence .
Karma
In recent decades there has been a significant increase in Western society of people interested in some ideas and concepts from Eastern beliefs because they consider that a series of questions related to Death respond more closely to their thinking.
It is possible to say that the interest that these concepts arouse would not have because to enter in conflict with the religious beliefs that one already has, can be valued as one more possibility to take into account.
Some of the conclusions that are usually reached when reflecting on death and its evolution is the injustice that would be the fact that in a single life, which can sometimes be very short, something as important as destiny is decided eternal for a soul, taking into account that not all enjoy the same opportunities. That is, there are those who come to this world in a favorable family environment, well-off, with well-being and education. And instead others are born in a very unfavorable family environment surrounded by misery and despair. It is these situations so different from each other that for many it is incomprehensible and unacceptable that their actions are judged with the same yardstick and without a second chance option.
For those people who believe or seriously consider the existence of the Reincarnation as a mechanism for the evolution of the human being, it will be necessary to complement it with the concept of Karma . Both are inseparable and offer a joint perspective on the need to have to live many lives to experience very diverse social, cultural, family situations, etc. that will allow to learn and evolve as human beings in the matter before being able to reach eternity in Heaven, in Paradise or Nirvana .
The word Karma is literally translated from Sanskrit as Action, but what really defines this term is the Universal Law of Action-Reaction or Cause and Effect .
This concept would be an essential element for the understanding of the apparent injustices that occur in our daily lives. Karma means that any Action undertaken by someone will have their corresponding Reaction sooner or later in a proportionate manner. This would be as valid for good as for bad actions. It would be a law of maximum Universal Justice to which we would all be subject and that no one could avoid. This law would be applied automatically in the same way that all natural laws act as the law of gravity and would not respond to any divine punishment but to a series of natural compensations that come to balance damages caused .
Most of our closest personal relationships would be subject to these karmic ties that we should resolve over the course of our lives. This could explain many situations that happen to us especially in our family environment as well as understand that injustice does not exist in itself, that nothing happens by chance and that many of the misfortunes we suffer today would respond to debts that we would have contracted previously . These debts could come even from stocks prior to the current one even if we are not able to remember them. Unexpected or early age deaths would also respond to certain karmic purposes or situations.
Those who assume as true the concepts of Reincarnation and Karma will be able to answer many questions concerning both their life and their death, accepting it as something natural and necessary that will be repeated many times along their evolutionary path to finally bring them back to Your True Home.
CONTACT
We offer guidance and spiritual support to anyone who feels fear or anguish towards their own death or who suffers the loss of a loved one.
We find in Meditation the best way to calm down and focus in order to observe our fears and see what we really need to change in our perception of life.
We are in Sant Celoni (Barcelona) and receive at agreed times.
You can come and explain your situation, it will be a pleasure to listen to you.If you have any comments, questions or questions you want to ask us you can write to this email:
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Face death
