It is the product of practices that are generated within our person being from our childhood, six fundamental practices to promote our self-esteem and obtain a fuller inner development.
The practice of:
1. live consciously
2. Accept yourself
3. take responsibility for oneself
4. self-affirmation
5. live with purpose
6. personal integrity
1. LIVING CONSCIOUSLY : Respect reality without evading or denying it - being present in what we do while we do it - Where my body is my mind - Being aware of the internal and external world.
2. SELF-ACCEPT : Do not deny or reject thoughts-feelings-actions, we cannot overcome undesirable feelings if we do not accept them-When there is self-acceptance, there is no confrontation with us, I am not my own enemy-Understanding our potential is accepting errors and powers, and implies responsibilities. By rejecting - sacrificing parts, we impoverish our self.
3. BE SELF-RESPONSIBLE: we are authors of our decisions and actions-realization of our wishes-choice of our companies and how we treat others, our body and our happiness.
4. HAVE SELF-AFFIRMATION : It is respecting our desires-needs, seeking to express them and treating ourselves with dignity in relation to others-being authentic is defending our convictions-values-feelings and communicating assertively with us and with those around us.
5. LIVING WITH DETERMINATION OR PURPOSE IN LIFE: to identify our goals and carry out the necessary actions to achieve them, is to have control of our life, not of the outside that surrounds us.
The Goals-purposes:
- organize-center our energies
- give meaning-structure to our existence
When I have no goal-purpose I am at the mercy of my impulses or actions of others. To live with conscious purposes I have to take responsibility for my goals-I need an ACTION PLAN and clear objectives-discipline-order-perseverance-courage to not deviate from the path.
6. LIVING WITH INTEGRITY IS :
Have principles of conduct, faithful in our actions
- Be congruent with what we think-say-act.
- Respect commitments-keep promises.
When I respond to the above, there is a more important result inside me than the approval of others. It is the approval of myself and I feel that I am a person who can be trusted and I like the kind of person I have made of myself. This is having self-esteem.
Self-esteem is not based on external values NOT VALUE FOR WHAT YOU HAVE, BUT FOR WHAT YOU ARE.
High self-esteem; Honesty-freedom-congruence-kindness-common good-creativity-gratitude-solidarity-work-communication-respect-perseverance.
Healthy self-esteem is the basis for actively and positively responding to opportunities that arise in work-love-fun and the basis of the serenity of spirit that makes it possible to enjoy life . Developing self-esteem is the conviction that one is competent to live and worthy of being happy, it is equivalent to facing life with more confidence-optimism, which helps to reach goals and experience fullness-Developing our self-esteem is to expand our ability to be Happy
RECOMMENDATIONS TO REACH GOALS:
1. Understand-accept that you have qualities that you can improve
2. Learn that your dream is only yours - no one can realize it
3. you have something good, you can be proud
4. Free yourself from concepts that negatively affect your person
5. Live responsibly according to reality
6. Accept that you are important
7. Learn to accept yourself through what you feel and are
8. Free yourself from guilt by evaluating what you want or think.
9. Act according to what you want-feel-think, without being based on the approval-disapproval of others.
10. Feel responsible for you, this builds trust.
11. Live authentically by learning to be congruent to feel and act.
12. Love the courage to love you as a person This is a right from the day you were born.
If I had the courage to make mistakes ...
I would not make so many mistakes.
I would be careful but more relaxed.
I could enjoy my job.
It would give more opportunity to new ideas.
I would have more ideas. I could be more creative. Would be happier.
It would not be irresponsible.
If I had a more understanding attitude towards my mistakes ...
I would not feel failed and try harder. I would give more.
I would like myself more. I would not be depressed.
I would be more aware. I would not fight with this fear.
I would be who I am, and not my parents' little boy.
When I learn to have a better attitude towards my mistakes ... I will feel less tense. I will be more responsible.
It will improve my work, I will try new things without fear.
I will have to say goodbye to my old script.
I will become a better father / mother to myself.
I will try harder.
I will have to learn that that is not indulgence with one
I will have to practice. I will have to get used to it.
I feel hopeful.
What I say to myself is ...
I'm doing to me what they did to me before
My parents are still in my head.
I have no more compassion for myself than my father had. I judge my worst than my mother judged me.
If I can't make mistakes, I can't grow.
I am suffocating myself.
My self-esteem is shattered with mistakes.
When I'm surprised at a mistake ...
I tell myself that I'm stupid. My name is useless.
I feel loser. I feel scared.
I wonder what will happen when they find out.
I tell myself that it is useless to insist. That is unforgivable.
I feel contempt for myself.
If someone had told me that it is normal to make mistakes ...
I would be a different person.
I wouldn't make so many mistakes, I wouldn't be so afraid to try something. I would not be so critical of myself.
I would be more open, more daring I would yield more.
“The six pillars of self-esteem” by Nathaniel Branden
Counselor Alejandra Alonso
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Transpersonal Counseling Empathy Generation.
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