There is an interior place that we should all recognize and preserve, a space of peace and stillness, that can offer us the feeling of being well and safe, despite what happens outside.
We should all be able to find in our interior a bowl of peace, in which to take refuge. However, when we go through difficult times, instead of finding calm and stillness, what is often felt is a great emptiness. A distressing and intolerable emptiness, from which one desperately wants to flee.
This refuge, which we all seek, should be built in childhood, with the careful and assertive company of the nearby environment . But, if we lacked this, or on the contrary, if what was outside was greater chaos and helplessness, this work could not be carried out.
Today we are facing children who react excessively to everything. What happens to them affects and alters them easily. They are vulnerable to any stimulus, they have very low tolerance and patience; They are reactive and impulsive. They lack calm, they have no interior place to go in search of tranquility. Everything impacts them, taking their balance easily.
What has happened to these children? What do they need from their parents, and from everyone who presents themselves as their guide?
It is not what you do, but how you do it
The child is born with the awareness that the world is good; and in the experiences of discomfort, pain or physical or mood discomfort, he hopes that the attitude of the adult confirms that it is indeed so.
If in the face of difficulties you find yourself impatient, intolerant, aggressive, altered emotions, or indifference, this bowl of peace, instead of growing and solidifying, will be weakening, or even collapsing.
The environment, its parents and close referents are the ones who can point the way to calm and return to itself. Through the conscious care, patience, dedication and stillness of the adult, a space of recollection, calm and shelter is generated in the child. But, when we talk about care, we often forget the subtleties, these being the ones that most affect the mood of the child.
What builds peace is the peace that accompanies each act of ours. The rhythm of our breathing, the warm look, the gesture of one hand, the serenity of our voice or the distension of the face, is the first thing that is captured. Beyond words, the child is in the tiny, simply and simply, because he only learns from what is true.
It will not be what we do, but the way it is done. With what predisposition, delivery, dedication or delicacy; With what joy and peace we present ourselves before the child in the good and bad moments ... Accompany them to sleep, be by their side doing a task, offer a hug or an advice, now becomes a sacred act.
The way we respond and be present in every act, from big to small, will be the hands that knead the clay and shape its bowl.
We may not have to do much; Maybe they taught us backwards. Do and do, give and give, for what, if the important thing is the essence. Similar to when you give the child a super-toy, and within minutes, after opening the package, you find it playing with its packaging.
What you are really giving is what you are covered with; In short, it is what you are.
To be able to grant something that really serves the present and the future, look inside, work on yourself, recover your peace . Only by knowing where the road is, can we indicate where to go.
AUTHOR: Nancy Erica Ortiz, Integral Pedagogue
SEEN AT: https://www.caminosalser.com/i1810-ensenale-al-nino-a-encontrar-su-propriate-paz/
