Part of learning to meditate has been to get into that experience where everything is peace and love as an election.
That is why recognizing that mental dialogue limits me to live fully
After a few weeks of being in an ishayas ascension retreat, trying to take distance from all the questions that go through my head I had to get into a taxi, when addressing it there was a feeling of sadness for a farewell, for not being able to be near someone very special any longer, I was just going to cry in tears at the feeling of loss that seemed very real in that started to ring in the car that got me A song in response to my feeling, the crying changed because my heart strangely began to smile, time and distance lost meaning, as if it had been heard.
When I need you, I just close my eyes and feel you, Rod Steward sang.
From those moments that marked my life, I had forgotten how it felt to be heard, I was used to pray to ask God for explanations and many other things, it is not that this bad prayer but my feeling was related to to the denial of the existence of a superior force in charge of everything, have the name of God, Universe or whatever, it had been for a long time to feel separated or punished because situations were presented as a bad play of Letters were as if I had been living from a tantrum, so prayer had lost meaning in my life.
As if to pray if no one will listen, it was my feeling.
I had learned to pray as an obligation, a time I also thought I was doing it to give orders on what life should be like, dear God I have been good, send me a good husband or a new car…
I left someone else's job not to take responsibility, how curious.
Returning to the taxi that strange coincidence with the song I lived it as when a prayer has an answer, it touched my being, maybe they are my romantic ideas about love, but it is of those times that you experience a communication with the whole .
When the heart smiles, there is no way that the head understands anything.
Realize that after all if there is something listening, that it is possible to communicate with that superior force is something wonderful.
Music has marked moments in my life but only to take me to that place, where forms, time, space can be observed.
That silent state of mind where communication develops, where I remember what it is like to listen, where I am always heard.
The stories lose meaning because the heart is smiling, there waiting only to be recognized.
Sure as this story of seeing God in a song there is more, not feeling heard has helped me discover other ways to communicate, the heart is presented as a plant that requires attention and care.
The temper tantrums are perhaps just the call to start looking the other way.
Intuition is developing as a good guide that helps me observe everything more full of life, even as if things or situations speak to me, like learning to witness the beautiful music that God is playing through everything exists
From this perspective God / Universe guiding everything, it is simple to recognize that we are nothing more than puppets in this game of life to play the role that is needed is done more lightly.
Definitely meditating teaches me every day to communicate better, maybe praying also sometimes is listening.
Michel editor of the White Brotherhood
