It is only Happy who is allowed to be happy By Francisco de Sales
IT IS ONLY HAPPY WHO IS ALLOWED TO BE HAPPY
By Francisco de Sales
Being happy is, to a large extent, a personal choice.
And Being Happy is a responsibility that must be assumed by devoting full attention and preferential priority.
We are not happier because we do not know what or how much is enough to be happy.
On more than one occasion we have felt the feeling of fullness of happiness with a meeting, a smile, or a call ... without more.
We have all seen people who, even having no possessions, and living in harsh conditions, are happy.
We have all attended a conversation in which one ends up saying, more or less, "you can be happy with any little thing ..."
Unhappiness is based, to a large extent, on the unconscious concerns we all have.
We know, and we are constantly spinning even if we do not realize, that a child has a problem, that in the house we have to make a repair, that we feel distant from a friend, that we are getting older, that our beloved mother is missing ... and that scares happiness.
We would like to have everything and everything was perfect around us.
We spend too much energy, too much attention, and too much time, in longing for what we no longer have, what has not been accomplished, the impossible ...
And that time that we dedicate to it we could invest better in being present in the present, in enjoying what we are and what we have within our reach
Happiness manifests itself in moments when our mind is not wandering in its pre-occupations, when we are in contact only with our center, and when we are not distracted by other things.
We say on many occasions, of those who know how to be happy often, that they are "irresponsible ones".
Is it good to be "irresponsible"?
Could it be that sometimes we get stuck in the role we call "responsible" and don't give ourselves permission to enjoy happiness?
Could it be that as we get older we believe we have to be serious?
I think you are only happy when you use your heart.
Happiness is not a matter of reason.
Think about the moments when you felt absolutely happy, and you will see that they have things in common: You were not aware of anything other than what triggered your happiness, and what brought you happiness was not something material.
Buy a new car or a new house, a promotion at work, spend money, a good meal in a good restaurant ... that gives you satisfaction, enthusiasm, pleasure, euphoria, content, a kind of joy ... and all that is very good, but that is not happiness: these are specific moments in time that disappear.
The sum of joys, laughs, smiles, satisfaction, fun, good humor, pleasure ... even though they are not true happiness -because they are ephemeral- they do cause a “feeling” of happiness, a “feeling” that looks a lot like happiness –That is less spectacular, and more discreet and prudent; The good part is that they predispose a good deal to be happy because they provoke an optimism that encourages them to relate well to happiness.
Being happy is not being happy, we already know that, although being happy can be a manifestation of being happy.
Being happy can be manifested as a serenity that does not require external demonstrations - although it can be seen in the eyes, in the smile and in the aura.
Happiness is not euphoric, it is almost invisible, because it is an inner feeling that looks more like peace than anything else.
It is an intimate satisfaction with oneself, the result of an acceptance of Himself, and of its past and present.
Any opposition to total acceptance prevents the manifestation of happiness.
And that acceptance needs an understanding of everything one has done in the past: what can be described as "bad" and what has been good. Understanding that one acted in the way he considered appropriate or in the way his abilities or circumstances allowed him then. And I have written "understanding, " and not "forgiveness." Because there is nothing to forgive or self-forgive. That would only show a kind of superiority and arrogance of the one who forgives today than he was yesterday.
Being happy is basically based on feeling good about Self-Esteem, on having a good relationship with oneself, on knowing how to appreciate life and its things, on knowing how to give up the impossible and not obsessing with the achievement of utopias, on understanding that you don't you can have everything or be the best, in knowing how to accept and knowing how to give up, in realizing that what is really important and important is to cultivate the relationship with oneself, and admit yourself without conditions in what you mistakenly call your “imperfections” and his "failures."
You will only be happy if you really intend to be happy and eliminate your own oppositions.
Allow yourself to be happy ... and you will be happy.
(Francisco de Sales, is the creator of the web www.buscandome.es, for people interested in psychology, spirituality, improvable life, Self-knowledge and Personal Growth)