Healing Series: Release your birth family, by Sandra Gusella
Dear people, it is a great pleasure for me to be with you again.
When I am with you and I speak through Pamela, I feel your presence and I see you as energy of light, looking for your way through a dark world, where you often find difficulties and energies with which you do not know how to deal.
You are all brave warriors. Your only presence in a physical body on earth speaks of your enormous courage and willingness to fight with the dark energies and with the obstacles that you find within yourself. Pamela is worried about the word 'fight' that I use here. But I nevertheless use the word here because you, in a way, are fighters: fighters who not only solve difficulties with the love of the heart, but with the sword of discernment.
Discernment means: being able to clearly recognize when the energies are not in harmony with yours (therefore you can release them from your energy field). Discernment is the energy of the sword, the masculine energy, and its importance in light of the subject I am going to discuss today is great.
I want to talk about the transition period, as you call it, the period that is sometimes called the transition from Pisces to Aquarius, or from the Third to the Fifth dimension. You have given many names to this energy transition that is currently happening in your earthly sphere.
I don't want to talk about this transition in terms of external events, in terms of predictions about what is going to happen on your land. For example on the number of earthquakes or catastrophes that should still take place before the change can be completed.
I want to talk about the change of the heart.
In many of you there is a need for some security. For this reason, you sometimes rely on theories about the transition and the predictions about which you read or listen. You get carried away by fear and / or curiosity. But in doing this, they sometimes lose sight of the fact that the same murky energies may be associated with those predictions.
Therefore I ask that when you read about predictions of the future, about this period of transition, always ask for the source. Ask for it with your heart, just feel what energy source these speculations come from, those theories about the transition. Use the sword of your discernment!
I strongly encourage you to understand this transition period internally.
Therefore I speak of the transition from ego-based consciousness to heart-based consciousness. I have described in detail this inner transformation in the Lightworkers series, which are found on the Pamela and Gerrit website. I speak in these terms because it is an inner transformation that all of you can feel inside. There is nothing outside of you that needs this change, and nothing outside of you can refrain from this. Nor is there a 'time limit', a period in which something had to be 'done' on time. It is an inner transformation that you, personally and singularly, are doing step by step.
In this channel I would like to illustrate this process of transformation (from the ego to the heart) with a subject with which all of you are deeply involved: the relationship with your own family of birth.
How you relate to your family, it says a lot about your own progress in the transition from ego-based awareness to heart-based awareness.
His birth here on earth can be compared to a kind of fall into darkness, but not connected with any association of sin and guilt. It is really a dive to the depth that you consciously took from a certain layer within your soul. The moment you immerse yourself, however, you are in a state of unconsciousness, then you are immersed in the world of matter. At that moment, you arrive at your mother's womb.
On the one hand, you carry with you a very bright energy, the energy of Home. You still remember what it is like to be on the other side, you remember the love you felt around you as something natural and the union with everything that is, everything that lives.
When you descend to the earth as an embryo, these energies of Home are still strongly with you. But at the same time you are confronted with what I call the paradigma of the parents .
Paradigm is a word that means as much as worldview, but it encompasses much more than that. It not only contains the thoughts and convictions of their parents but also their feelings, their deepest emotions. All that security network is the paradigm within which they submerged themselves as a new soul that comes to earth, at the beginning of their new incarnation.
You are immersed in the reality of the third dimension, or as I like to call it: the world of ego-based consciousness, as it is represented in your parents . This is an energetic reality in which certain illusions predominate.
I want to mention here the three most important illusions.
1. The loss of the master
The first illusion is the illusion of the loss of the master. This illusion makes you forget, while living, working, and living on earth, that you are the creators of everything that happens in your life. You do not recognize what happens in your life as your own creation, from time to time you think you are a victim. You believe that there are powers, greater than you, that can make and plan your life. This is the loss of the master.
2. The loss of the unit
And then, with the dive deep inside, that dive into the paradigm of their parents, who have lived in illusion for quite some time, is also the loss of unity with everything what he lives The recognition of unity between you and the world, between you and the other is lost to you. Within the ego-based consciousness there is the conviction that all of us are separated from each other, each in a separate body. There is a belief that we live in that body and that it costs a lot of work to contact others. It is the illusion of the body as a prison. That is the second illusion.
3. The loss of love
And the third illusion that I would like to mention here is the loss of love. In the sphere outside of which you come to earth, the energy of love has been a patent nutrient. When they come here to a relatively dark world, where there is much heartbreak, they begin to confuse love with all kinds of energies that are not love, as an admiration for emotional dependence. Later in this channel I will return to this confusion.
Now, I would like to take you to that moment when you are born here, one foot still in heaven, the other on earth, in that paradigm you do not fit well in all that. There are always specific points with which their parents are closely linked to the paradigm. There are also points where they are free of him, that is, there are aspects in which the energy of the heart has been released in them. But there are always some points at which they are also very attached to the ego-based consciousness paradigm.
And there you arrive, as it says, fresh from heaven. What happens next in the development of the child in relation to his parents, is that at the beginning he will adhere very strongly to the paradigm of his parents, and then he will begin to slowly release him as he ages. This development process is closely related to the transition from the energy of the ego to the energy of the heart that is taking place in the collective consciousness of humanity as a whole.
What is taking place on a large scale, is also happening on a small scale, at the level of the individual. The transition from ego-based awareness to heart-based awareness on a micro-level often occurs by transcending the limiting energies, loaded with fear, that you have received from your parents during your childhood.
I want to describe this transformation of consciousness on a small scale, for example describing the relationship between parents and children, because it is very easy for you to recognize it at the level of personal experience. I do not like predictions or announcements that are not in tune with the experience, which cannot be recognized by your own heart, by your own feelings. This is why I ask you again: when you read or listen to a material about the transition period, please question them with your heart and see if they fit your own experience. Because you are no longer students, you are all teachers. Your own experience is the test criteria.
Their hearts are full of intuitive, tender and gentle feelings about what is happening. Trust them. How this internal change of consciousness will be defined externally, in the physical reality of the earth, all that is not important. We will succeed when we succeed.
It is the passage of the heart, the inner passage, in the realm of emotions, that really counts in the transition of the New Age.
The moment you start life here on earth, you encounter reality primarily through your parents. Upon arriving here you bring with you the memory of Home, and feel a peaceful feeling of nostalgia. We have previously mentioned the trauma of cosmic birth (see channel 3 in these series), which you carry with you as a soul, all the way from the beginning of your journey through all your lives on earth and elsewhere. But every time you begin to live as a child in a specific earthly life, there is also a birth trauma. I want to say this mainly in a psychological sense: always say goodbye to the Home, and the need to correct this, to find your own way in the energy of the earth.
At the time of their birth, parents belong to the energy of the earth. They have already adapted to this dimension, to the laws that apply here. They are often limiting laws, in the area of social norms and ideas that parents have absorbed markedly, which are not patent to the child at all.
In this way the parents represent for the child the ego-based consciousness, the paradigm of the three illusions. The child is confronted with this through the paternal home, and the way in which this paradigm has developed in the parents will influence him for the rest of his life.
Of course parents - Pamela asks me to add this thought, because he doesn't want parents to be put in an unfavorable light - at some point they have also been children, and they have gone through the same process. Parents do not consciously force their fears and illusions on their children. However, at the stage in which they have children, adults have unconsciously absorbed many energies of the old ego-based paradigm, the paradigm that is formed by the three illusions that we have mentioned above.
The child enters this fresh and new and realizes that reality does not correspond, is not in harmony with what he was used to. In that very early phase of his life, the child is in a rather passive state of consciousness. He is very open in his being, in his mind and in his feelings, and absorbs everything around him. Especially in the first three months the child's ability to absorb is incredible, it assimilates all of the energy reality that surrounds it, within the deepest nucleus of its cells.
He drinks a single drink, and experiences it as reality, the energetic reality of the direct environment, usually that of the parents. On the other hand, that 'piece of heaven' is still within it, that core of being pure, unconditional that is not affected by illusions.
In a way these energy realities collide with each other, but the child keeps this hidden from himself. Because this conflict is too painful to experience in this very vulnerable stage in which the child is when he is a newborn. To hide this collision, this inner conflict for himself, the child will adjust to his surroundings. He wants to find a ratification, in his environment, for these energies of love, unity, and mastery that are still present in him in his natural state.
The child is still a master of his reality, he feels united and one has love, but he wants it to be confirmed by his surroundings. He begins to seek confirmation, but frequently receives confusing messages from his environment.
His parents want to give him love, but there is also a lot of fear in them. There is a lot of blocked energy that cannot flow, that they are not allowed to flow. There is also in the parents a longing, a feeling of longing for their own mastery, their love, their natural bond with All That Is, but they have lost this state of mind a long time ago. They have become so accustomed to life on earth with all their illusions, that they have begun to consider these illusions as real.
Therefore unconsciously, parents will raise their children with energies that are confusing to them. And again, to a certain extent parents cannot be blamed for this, in the sense that on a conscious level they are often working hard to give their children the best.
When a child is born, parents will often have an opening to more light and love. At that time, a core of unconditional, divine love will be touched on the parents. They feel the sacred character of birth and the little being that has been trusted in them and in life. At the birth of the child their hearts are wide open, and they are in contact with their own divine, sacred being. But this is often temporary, because later everything will begin to calm down, to become involved again in the energetic reality of the parents that existed before the birth of the child. And so the opening to reality based on the heart that was there, can also close again and often does. Parents go back to their old ways of thinking, feeling and wanting.
And then what happens to the growing child?
Most children choose to adapt so emphatically to the paternal paradigm that they lose contact with their original soul energy, the one they still had a lot of awareness at the beginning of their incarnation. In this first phase of life (until puberty) they are so worried about focusing on this world, and getting the love and attention of their parents, that they themselves forget who they are.
The child has an unbridled longing for love and closeness and when the parents cannot provide it sufficiently, the child will lean away to get it anyway. He will create illusory images of love.
He will take undue energies for love, for example the pride of a father when the son achieves something that in the external world is seen as intelligent or well done. This kind of paternal pride really has nothing to do with the child. It is not a pride in an inner achievement, but in an external performance that does not necessarily originate in the child's internal impulses. The child can grow up seeing this kind of pride as love. And often later in his life he will get to work very hard and will not understand, being an adult, why he has the urge to work so hard all the time, why work has become an addiction for him.
A second distortion or illusory image of love is when the child begins to confuse love with emotional dependence. Many parents have experienced a lack of real love during their childhood. They have not felt truly welcomed in an atmosphere of cordiality and security. When they then have a child, they hug him with mixed cues. On the one hand, there is genuine love, on the other hand there is the subconscious need to replace the loss. Parents try to heal their own emotional wounds by finding love and emotional security, which they lost in their past, through their relationship with their children. When this happens, the child receives very confusing signals from his parents.
The energy will make you aware, the messages "I love you" and "I need you" will be inextricably intricate. By this entanglement, which you could imagine as a spiral of twisted ropes, the child begins to associate love with need. This entanglement or illusion is the beginning of an emotional relationship of dependence between parents and children, which can have a very destructive result, not only in the parent-child relationship, but also in the long intimate relationships that the child will have as an adult.
In the relationships she has with other adults, she could easily begin to think that being needed is an essential ingredient of love in that relationship. They could then begin to interpret feelings of dependence, including jealousy and the dominant character, as a form of love, while these energies are diametrically opposed to love.
Summing up this first part of the material, you see that being children at birth they land on a fatherly paradigm that in the beginning, that is, the first half of their lives, will cause a lot of confusion. It is as if you were led astray, and at some point opportunities and possibilities enter your life that invite you to investigate, to untangle the knot. Then you could suffer an identity crisis, in which nothing is true and you constantly doubt who you are and who you are not. This has been described in the Lightworkers series as the first phase of the transition from the ego to the heart.
The true disentanglement of your illusions and mistakes take place when you contact the energy of the heart, also described in the series of the Lightworkers. As for their parents, this means being really able to release and forgive them inwardly and begin to follow their own path.
In a sense you have been the victims of your parents; their parents as representatives of ego-based awareness during their childhood. You have lived temporarily and partially according to your illusions. In a way, you had no choice, while you were children. However, transcending this state of being the victim is one of the most powerful ruptures that you can have in your lives. When you can recognize the deepest energy impressions of your childhood as such this makes you a free person, and then you decide which ones suit you and which ones are better to release. This is master.
Then you will no longer subconsciously adapt to the wishes and desires of your parents, when they are not your own. At the same time, you will no longer rebel against them either. You can see the impressions that do not suit you simply as something that does not belong to your period. You never need to judge your parents for charging them with these aspects. You don't have to fight them anymore.
You are introduced to ego-based awareness through your parents and you transcend it again through your parents, specifically releasing them in love and loss and recognition. Going to yourself as the independent teacher you are. This is your master's claim, the recognition that you are the creators of your life and of everything you have chosen, including the wrong path you have taken.
The Lightworkers and their parents
At this point I would like to speak specifically about the Lightworking souls. Also they at birth are immersed in the paradigm of the parents who have chosen for themselves as souls. Now, the Lightworkers frequently carry with them an extra allowance in relation to the parents or the paternal paradigm.
The Lightworkers, when they come to earth, intend to plant the seed, the shoots of Christ consciousness, the energy of the New Age. In an even deeper sense than the other souls, The Lightworkers have the purpose of understanding the paradigm of the heart in earthly reality. Specifically for this reason - and this may seem like a paradox - many Lightworking souls choose families to incarnate in them, in which there is much darkness. By darkness I simply refer to the illusions of which I spoke earlier, the three illusions that lead to the loss of their mastery, the loss of their true unity, the loss of love.
Thus, when the Lightworkers come to earth with a developed consciousness, a refinement or 'antiquity' in their souls, they end up in families where something is happening, where a certain illusion is experienced to the extreme. By the nature of their mission, the Lightworkers are like a magnet dragged into situations where energy has become stuck, where energy is paralyzed as in a dead end. They feel it is their task to make energy flow back there.
And this is why Lightworkers are often born into difficult families.
When they begin life, Lightworkers often have a strong confidence that they will find their way out, that they will overcome the limiting energy. However, when they are born as children and grow up, they are exposed to the same dilemmas and confusion as any other child. In a certain sense, they even experience this confusion more deeply and more intensely. Because they carry with them much of the energy of the Home, they (inwardly) collide frontally with the energy models locked in their environment and this hurts them deeply. Thus there is a certain risk involved in the journey of the Lightworkers to those places of darkness or error. It is a dangerous mission. Do not forget why I call you brave warriors, it is for this reason.
Your birth here is a landing in an inhospitable landscape with only you, your inner knowledge, as luggage. There is a low resonance with the environment, not much recognition and admission of who you are. It is the foreigner that you seek as a Lightworker. As a Lightworker you are the pioneers who want to change the direction of something, change something, and you are always the first to do that in that environment. Therefore you do not meet your peers at that time. And that hurts, it's hard for a human soul. As a spiritual entity you have chosen this path consciously but as a human being, while you are children you can be cruel. This is why I encourage you to feel and recognize that pain in yourself, because only by doing so can you work with it and release it. It is the pain of a child who is helpless and never finds recognition of his originality. The child is a stranger in that environment. Lightworkers experience this even more because they are 1. very 'different', and 2. seek an environment where being different is not recognized or accepted with difficulty.
The whole trip of the child towards adulthood and even towards old age, can be seen as a challenge to find his own, innate inner light again. The challenge is to be, from deep inside, to know and feel again: "This is me, and this is what I have come to bring here."
This is especially true for Lightworkers. Their assignment above all is to become who they are. In doing so, they carry out their mission. It is not your task to improve the world. It is your task to find yourself. And yes, the world will become a better place for this, because its Light will then shine in a natural way. But you don't have to work for this, it will only happen.
The real job is to release all those bits of ego paradigm (fear, illusion) that you absorbed so deeply as children, during the first three months and after.
This release is an extremely heavy task. I don't want to discourage you by telling you this. Moreover, I want to teach you that you can have a lot of respect for yourself and that you are the brave warriors that I know. The challenge is really to be everything you can be in an environment that is not your own. This is the work of the pioneer, of the one who paves the way for a new consciousness here on earth.
Resolving family karma
In the texts that have been previously located on the site (the Lightworkers series) I have talked a lot about the stages they must go through to get rid of ego-based awareness and start moving to live from the heart. Therefore here I will not touch these issues. I want to say something specifically about the relationship with your parents and I want to relate it to the meditation exercises that Gerrit has done at the beginning.
(This has not been published.)
It is important to be aware of all the feelings involved in the relationship with your parents, in particular the feelings that your inner child has towards them. Therefore, it can be very instructive to reverse the roles, as in the exercise. (In this exercise, you meet your parents as children.) Things that you did not suspect may come to light.
This reversal of roles carries in it a seed of truth. In essence, you (too) are the parents of your parents. It was his intention to play the part of parents when you came to earth in that specific family: you wanted to drive your parents somewhere, or away from something; you wanted to invite them to turn to a more enlightened reality.
You often think you have failed in this. They feel like they have failed, that they have not been able to help their parents in the way they have planned.
However, that's not true.
The question is to truly understand what 'help' means. This works as follows:
When you are born, you are landed in a paradigm to which you essentially do not belong. But you start living on it, you absorb it so intensely that it becomes part of you. It becomes such a part of you that you really don't know what is yours anymore and what isn't. Subconsciously this hurts them and leads them to an inner conflict. As you become adults, you can choose to become aware of this pain and work on it. They enter the path of inner growth and consciousness. You are becoming aware of each of the deepest layers of pain in yourself, and they heal you. The pain of not being recognized, the pain of loneliness, all those pieces emerge.
And while you are doing that, you are fulfilling your task. You are helping your parents, not directly but indirectly. What they are really doing is marking a path, an energy footprint.
You are rising from a certain valley, a dark area where certain illusions govern, and you leave behind a trace. Climbing requires a tremendous amount of strength and energy. And this is their mission, the task they have been assigned. When clearing the path, the 'solution footprint', this footprint will be energetically available for their parents, for their family and for anyone who wants to use it, that is, anyone who is in a dead end can use the energy of the solution, which you have made available through your climbing out of the deep. (See also the channel 'Traps on the road to become a healer' for the notion of the 'energy of the solution').
Thus, the mark that you create on the path to your own enlightenment, to your own joy, is the fulfillment of your task. In addition, it is not your job to also carry your parents or others close to you, on your back. You don't have to make them change, make them separate from the old fears and illusions. That is not your task. Your task is to create an energy footprint, which you make through your own inner growth and liberating.
The notion of family karma, which is used in esoteric circles, can lead to misunderstandings in this regard. In the case of family karma it is assumed that there is a karma that goes beyond the individual, that belongs to a family and that someone from that family (the Lightworkers, of course) can assume it. It is true, by the way, that in a family - and this can be traced back to many generations - a certain subject, certain problems can be repeated over and over again. This could even have genetic implications. At a certain level the solution is sought for these problems, and they will be transmitted until the solution arrives.
Many souls, not only the Lightworkers, have been transmitted a part of karma that belongs to the family of birth in a certain family line. Los Trabajadores de la Luz con frecuencia eligen esto concientemente y tienen el propósito explícito de contribuir al desenredo o al desembrollo de la energía atascada.
Pero esta contribución no los vincula a ustedes con tener que liberar a su familia de ese karma. Es liberarse a ustedes mismos de ese karma. Al hacerlo así, ustedes crean un espacio energético de posibilidades que luego los otros pueden usar, si ellos quieren. Los otros también pueden elegir no hacerlo; este es su derecho y esto es algo que para ustedes es muy difícil de liberar.
A veces ustedes realmente tienen la idea de que figuradamente tienen que arrastrar a sus padres o seres queridos hacia arriba de la montaña. Que el éxito de su misión realmente depende en el cambio que tiene lugar en la vida de otras personas.
Esto no es así. Aquellos, a quienes ustedes aman y desean mucho llevar a la Luz, pueden vivir por un par de siglos más en el valle. Pero un día ellos encontrarán una pequeña huella que va hacia arriba y pensarán “¡eh!, esto es interesante, parece bueno probar esto, realmente no la estoy pasando bien aquí abajo”. Y ellos parten. Ellos siguen su propio camino de crecimiento interior, su propia escalada hacia la Luz. ¿Y no es esto maravilloso, no es fantástico que haya ahí para ellos una huella a la cual puedan agarrarse?
Ellos aún seguirán su propio camino, pero ahí siempre habrá un faro. Un terreno ha sido allanado para ellos, por lo tanto será más fácil para ellos tomar aquellos pasos. Debido a ustedes. Esa es su tarea; ese es el rol del pionero: despejar el camino a través de la selva, a través de algo que no ha sido conquistado o trazado previamente.
Si ustedes triunfan en deshacerse de las tres ilusiones, si ustedes pueden permitir que las energías de la maestría, de la unidad y del amor fluyan en sus vidas, entonces ustedes est n en contacto con el coraz ny ustedes viven desde una conciencia basada en el coraz n. Entonces pueden soltar el viejo paradigma y en un cierto sentido dejar a sus padres. No literalmente, sino interiormente. Despedirse de sus padres interiormente significa: dejar que ellos sean quienes son, no intentar cambiarlos nunca m s. Comprender que no es su tarea conducirlos literalmente a ellos a alg n lugar. Su tarea est hecha; han marcado un camino, con amor. Para esto han venido, ustedes no han fallado.
Ustedes ver n que luego de este adi s interior, la relaci n con sus padres se volver menos tensa, que las energ as de lucha, reproche y culpa podr n dejar la escena.
En su ambiente directo, pueden aparecer ahora otras personas que son parte de lo que ustedes pueden llamar su familia espiritual . Su familia espiritual no tiene nada que ver con la biolog a, con los genes o con la herencia. Se trata de almas semejantes. Estas son almas que con frecuencia ustedes conocen de vidas previas. A menudo ustedes tienen un v nculo de amistad con ellas. Cuando ustedes se encuentran con alguien as, pueden estar asombrados de cu nf cilmente tiene lugar el contacto y de cu n pronto pueden reconocerse uno al otro en toda clase de aspectos.
Al principio, ustedes han pasado a trav s de muchos problemas para ser capaces de vivir con el hecho de ser diferentes. Frecuentemente han tenido el sentimiento de no encajar, pero luego cuando ustedes realmente sueltan su viejo paradigma, se cruzar n personas en su camino con quienes este ser diferentes es la conexi n, la afinidad que sienten.
Eso les da una inmensa cantidad de alegr ay de satisfacci n. Es la energ a de su verdadera familia, de sus compa eros de alma, con quienes sentir n el reconocimiento que han buscado todo este tiempo. Cuando ustedes son capaces de reconocerse a ustedes mismos independientemente de cualquiera, entonces estas relaciones y amistades satisfactorias pueden aparecer autom ticamente en sus vidas y con total naturalidad.
Pamela Kribbe 2005
Translation: Sandra Gusella
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Esta canalizaci n se mantuvo el 10 de octubre de 2004 en nuestro lugar de trabajo en Tilburg.
Eltexto hablado ha sido luego corregido en cierto modo para facilitar su lectura.
Este mensaje fue traducido desde el holand s al ingl s por la dra. Wendy Gillissen (sitio web www.reincarnatietherapie.com), y luego desde el ingl s al espa ol por Sandra Gusella.