You are experiencing pain in your body. It is intense and uncomfortable. You have visited all kinds of doctors, healers, therapists and self-help experts. You have tried Western medicine, alternative therapies, healing energies, meditation, songs, change of diet, medications, amazing spiritual experiences, guru transmissions, prayers, retreats, hypnosis. You have tried to have a positive thought, anesthetize the pain, ignore it, say 'no'; You have tried to be 'pure conscious presence' or an 'attachment-free witness' ... But the pain is still here, and it seems that no one can help you right now. What can you do?
Will you still look for a solution, a therapy that works? Will you place your hopes in a future that may or may not become? Or will you give up now, simply accepting that there is nothing that can be done?
It may be that the answer is right in the middle, as most real responses do.
You see, maybe your pain has something to show you, something that pleasure, or the absence of pain, or even the fact of 'getting what you want' could never show you. Perhaps the reason for the pain here is to reveal your true path. Not to destroy you, but to focus. To reveal the courage, compassion and equanimity in you that you never imagined possible. To make you more humble, to lead you to a place of gratitude, and calm, and truth. Then, the question of 'How can I be free of pain now?' Is reframed, to 'Is there intelligence in this pain? Is there any deeper invitation here? Is there a lesson buried deep in my pain? Is there anything you want to be taken into account? Something hidden so far that wants to make itself known? '
What's worse, the pain itself, or your demand to be pain free right now? The sensations of the body that are given moment-by-moment, or your war against them? The pain, or your frustration and despair at the fact that 'it is still there' and 'that it hasn't disappeared yet'? The pain, or the feeling that you are trapped inside your body, that your body has betrayed you? The pain itself, or your broken dreams and hopes?
You may want to explore what is really causing most of your stress, depression and fear. Is it the pain itself, or your attitude towards it? You will discover that there is a world of difference between body pain and suffering and the sadness surrounding that pain. You may discover that you feel really much worse when you think about your pain, when you ruminate, when you worry and become obsessed with it. When you think about yesterday's pain or the absence of it, when you imagine a pain in the future, when you fantasize about the pain will never disappear, imagining that it will end up killing you; when you think about all the things you did 'wrong' - that's suffering, and it's the unnecessary part. All of these are thoughts, images, ideas, visions, perspectives, obsessions, memories, fantasies - not the living reality of the present moment.
When you disconnect from the present moment, and get involved in the story about your pain, you will discover that feelings of frustration, fear and anger begin to form that even become overwhelming. You start focusing on so many things that you stop having direct control over this moment. You dream of the past, when you felt pain free and yearn to return there (you can't). Everything was so good, back then. You think again and again how your pain prevents you from doing what you like, how it is not allowing you to live the life you had planned. Imagine a future full of pain and disconnection. And you begin to feel helpless, and terribly disappointed, and even full of rage against life, the universe and everything. This is not the life you had wanted or imagined, the life that you had been promised. You focus on everything you can no longer do, what you are not, what you have lost, what you will never return. You blame your pain for ruining your life. You feel so far from healing, from love, from your true life; So disconnected from your body, so isolated, so alone.
You have tried everything, everything, except the obvious: accept your pain, be present for him, today.
Now, let's be clear on this: Accepting does not mean giving up the possibility that the pain will decrease or even disappear tomorrow, or the next week, or the next year. It just means that your peace does not depend on whether this happens or not.
You are claiming, recovering your happiness, today, regardless of what the future brings.
Accepting your pain does not mean that you abandon yourself or that you become a victim of life. Everything else! It means getting out of all your annoying and scary stories of the past and future, and aligning yourself with the point where you are today. It means that you become an ally of this day, not your victim. It means saying YES how you are at the moment, even if where you are is not what you had expected. It means being in deep contact with this moment, with this body and with its potential to heal, with the ground where you stand, with the entire universe while dancing. It means admitting that you are not in control of this ancient cosmos, that there is a deep intelligence operating here, infinitely more wise than the human ego. It means admitting that you cannot know how the next scene of your life will look. It means getting out of the history of time and space. It means trusting and acting from trust. It means taking advantage of the creativity of each moment; Be open to connections, solutions, answers, and yes, completely unexpected joys.
When you fight with your pain, when you run away from it, you become its victim, because you are allowing it to have power over you, you are allowing your joy to be diminished by He. You are empowering pain through your resistance, through your effort to get rid of it, when trying to escape, even when you try to get rid of it. There is violence. And as you may have noticed, your attempt to get rid of him, until now, has failed; Your resistance has not led you to a true cure. It has only separated you most from your body, from your presence, from your peace, from the people you want, from gratitude, from the intelligence of the moment the source of true healing n. And it has ended up depleting you, consuming your energy reserves. Think of all the energy that has been invested in that fight - energy that could be used to nurture yourself. When you fall to the point of acceptance, you see pain as an ally, a guide, a teacher, not a threat to your life or your path. The Yes is the claim, the recovery of your power, not your passivity. You are releasing something unnecessary, without becoming a victim or tolerating something you do not want.
You leave the story that creates the thought: the pain should have disappeared already (you cannot know it) or the pain never disappear (you cannot know it ). All this is a thinking based on the past and the future, nightmares and dreams. You stop comparing how you are now with how you want to be, you stop focusing on the increasing distance between both situations. You stop creating the image of free of pain, and you stop comparing this moment with that image. You let go of the story of I should have lived in a different way I generated this pain I am guilty . That is wanting to rewind the movie of your life, and you also have no power in that direction. You eliminate the burden of time by making yourself present for this moment. Presence is your true source of power - and ultimately, your healing.
You stop focusing on everything you can't do right now, on everything you are not. The focus on lack or 'what is not here' will only make you feel more depressed, helpless and disconnected. You return your focus to what you can do, to what you are, to what is present, to what has not been lost, to what is still possible, to today's gifts, to everything that pain cannot. touch. To all the things that make life worth living. To all that, perhaps, finally, pain has made you remember. Perhaps all this is a call to radical simplicity.
You become curious to know this moment - this scene in the movie of your life. You are fascinated with this moment, with everything that is alive here. This breath. Those sensations The feeling of the earth under your feet. The sound of a bird singing. A car blowing the horn. And the pain is also here - you see all that, without judgment, and you also don't judge any judgment that comes up. You notice in you the desire for the pain to disappear - but neither do you make that your enemy. You notice the deep urgency of being pain free, of escaping to any other time or place. You notice a frustration, a disappointment that the pain is still there, that has not yet evaporated. You don't fight those thoughts or feelings, but you stay curious, connected with the moment. You start accepting those feelings within you. You accept even feelings of non-acceptance; You accept non-acceptance movements. You get out of your mind and align with your body. You feel the breath, its movement, the rhythm, its immediacy, its presence. You feel how it rises and falls like a wave in the immense ocean. You feel how your belly expands and contracts. You know you are (are) here, right now. Sign alive. A brave explorer. Willing to investigate, and in no hurry to draw conclusions.
You leave the history of your pain, the story of the pain of yesterday and tomorrow, the memory of past pain and the anticipation of future pain. That whole story turns out to be very unpleasant. You stop thinking about your pain right now, and you commit to communing with him in this present moment. You pay attention to the sensations in the body again. For a moment, you put aside the word 'pain' (an extremely heavy and solid word that comes from the past) and directly explore and feel the raw sensations that constitute your present experience of pain. Do they feel tense, contracted, soft? Heavy, hot, cold, sharp, deaf? Now, put aside even those words and return to pay attention to real sensations, without labeling them, with a curious and open spirit.
Remember, you are not trying to get rid of those feelings, or interrupt them, or disappear or even heal them. You are staying very close, offering your loving attention and the warmth of your presence to that part of the body that cries out for your attention. Continue exploring. Can you identify a 'center' in your pain? Does your pain have any contour? Does it throb, beats, vibrates? Experiment trying to shift your attention to the central point of your pain. If the sensations begin to move, follow them throughout your body. If they intensify, it's fine - keep your curiosity. If they start to fade, to expand, to soften, wonderful - stay close. Do not expect any particular result, but allow any expectation to arise and observe it. Any expectation held too long can lead to disappointment when it comes to seeing reality. Notice that too. Whatever appears, welcome it - it even welcomes your inability to embrace reality.
If you wish, you can play experiment with breathing. As you inhale, feel or imagine the breath flowing into the area where the discomfort is felt, imbued with life and oxygen. You will be dignifying that sensitive part in you. You will remember that it has the right to be there, too; the right to be included in the breath and in the body, and not be excluded. It is very loving to give a breath to the pain, to evaporate the illusory division. Instead of generating contraction around pain, contracting yourself around him, you offer him a breath, imbued with love, inspiration and life. You will be honoring the presence of pain at this time, instead of waiting for its disappearance in time. You will be remembering a deep approval in the heart of the experience. You will not be trying to make the pain go away, but exploring the nature of its appearance.
You may begin to notice that, like everything in life, pain is not solid, but an amorphous mass of sensations that dance, changing moment-by-moment. Sometimes you will discover that the pain is not really there. Sometimes, with gentle and loving attention, intense pain will soften, dissipate, relax, become less stabbing, more diffuse. Sometimes the pain may be stronger. Sometimes you will concentrate on other matters - a piece of music, a conversation, an outdoor walk, a meditation, or a beautiful reverie - that will make you forget that the pain was there. (Is pain present when you are not aware of it?). You can learn to value those moments. Your real experience of pain is constantly changing, evolving, changing, it is never the same. The story 'I feel pain' or 'the pain is constant' is often unable to begin to describe the reality of pain: completely alive, moment-by-moment. Remember, from the point of view of the present moment, there is no such thing as 'always', 'never', not even a 'constant'. There is no yesterday, there is no tomorrow. There is only Now. Now is the only thing you are dealing with.
You can see your pain as an enemy, essentially 'bad' or 'wrong' or as a 'mistake', or you can see it as an ally in your brave exploration of life. Many have awakened from the dream of suffering not in spite of pain, but because of pain. Pain has taught them to slow down, to pay attention to parts of themselves that otherwise would not have been taken care of. He has taught them to get out of the stories of the past and future, and trust, rest in the moment. He has taught them to breathe, to explore, to feel grateful for the simplest things. To soften but acquiring great power. To focus on what really matters in life. To value and appreciate the day, discover the preciousness of each encounter, of each moment of joy, of each moment of sadness, of making friends with everything - even with its disappointments, fears, and moments of despair. Let go of the dreams of 'what could have been', and wake up to the reality of 'what is'. For many, pain has taught them humility; their ego has penetrated them, they have broken their old dreams of spirituality into a thousand pieces and taken them to a place of surrender and love. He has forced them to take their true path, kicking and shouting. Ironically, he has taught them the true meaning of healing.
If you just stopped comparing yourself, friend, you could find hidden gifts and teachings in your extraordinary experience of pain. And your intention could change - from the attempt to get rid of the pain, to listen to it, being present to its appearance, wondering what it is that it is asking for. You could move from violence and despair to gentleness, acceptance, calm and patience. You could start a friendly conversation with your pain.
Pain can destroy you or it can center you. It can immerse you in sleep and depression, or it can wake you up. It can make you a victim, or it can help you feel more powerful, more aligned, more connected than ever with your true life.
I'm not saying you should try to like your pain. That is unrealistic. I am not saying that you become a masochist or a fearless warrior. That is unnecessary. I am not even saying that you should stop going to the doctor or the healer, the therapist or a friend who can help you, to offer you another point of view regarding the reason for your pain. I'm asking you - for the time being, at least for today - listen to your pain to find the intelligence there. Let you get out of all those complicated stories based on fear that surround your pain. Stop thinking so much about your pain, and opt for some sweetness, and exploration. Acceptance cannot make your pain worse. It can only take you deep into the immense mystery of healing.
And one day, not too far away, you will be able to see in retrospect and thank your pain for having had the ability to stand firm, curious, open. You may realize that your pain was not an obstacle in your path - that it was really your path, and your greatest teacher.
Source: http://presenciaconsciente.tumblr.com/post/98692861287/nuestra-relacion-con-el-dolor-fisico-como
Our Relationship to Physical Pain: How to Recover Our Power by Jeff Foster
