Suffering is part of the human experience.
People harm each other: we harm others and others harm us. To know this is to begin to see clearly. We are not only victims. Many times we become executioners committed to scaring those who have made us suffer. The only way to solve this addiction to blame the rest, and react accordingly, is to make friends with pain, loneliness and suffering to understand that of others.
Compassion arises when one recognizes that he has been at the same point. Angry, jealous, lonely, spiteful ... we have strange and conflicting behaviors that others don't understand either. If we feel alone, we say cruel words; if we want someone to love us and not do as we wish, we insult him; if we are afraid of being abandoned, we ignore it ... reactions that carry the seed of incongruity in themselves.
We begin to put ourselves in each other's shoes when we recognize, not that we are superior and from that pedestal we forgive, but that we have been in the same state and reacted in the same way. The more we know our poisons, the more we understand those of others.
The ego plays tricks on us. Try to customize everything. It is a room that we decorate to our liking, we have at our temperature, we spray with the preferred aromas and complete with the music we choose. The more we want life to adapt to our tastes, the more you fear others, and what is outside your room is getting bigger and more impossible. Instead of being more relaxed we begin to close windows and doors.
When we go out, the experience of living with the rest becomes more unpleasant and impossible. We are more irritable, more fearful, more sensitive than ever. The more you try to do things your way, the less comfortable you feel. To begin to understand others is to open the door to be honest with yourself and embrace the feeling of understanding them.
Many times it is the expectations not fulfilled by others, those that harm us, not themselves. Let us not set goals with what the rest should give us of ourselves because in reality what we want with it is to win ourselves, to succeed in what we project for others without counting on them, with their reactions, with their peculiar starting point.
Let us feel free of demands with them. We walk in their shoes some stretch and if we definitely conclude that we are in front of a person who causes us a free pain, let's rejoice in some way because we are in front of a teacher. If with this we are learning to communicate, not to win, that will be the true path to our evolution.
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