The forgiveness falls like soft rain from heaven to earth. It is twice blessed: bless the one who gives it and the one who receives it.
William Shakespeare
In 2006, the Japanese coaching expert Yoshinori Noguchi gave us a very interesting self-help work called The Mirror Law . In this short and emotional story, he recreates the power that this law has over us if we apply it in contact with others. It is, in fact, an important and very effective tool to get to know those things about us that we cannot see with the naked eye . And it teaches us that by paying attention and working on our own conflicts, we can also strengthen the way we relate to others.
Noguchi tells us in the law of the mirror that every event that takes place in reality is a result, caused by a cause that is within us. Therefore, he says, life is like a mirror that allows us to identify as a person.
For those interested, here is the work of this great teacher.
Mirror Law: Reality as a reflection of self
We are very used to pointing out the culprits of our unhappiness . He is my boss who does not value me, he is my partner who does not listen to me, he is my brother who envies me, etc. You are a victim of the influence they have on you. And this is generating a resentment that accumulates over time until it explodes.
But that is the fault of others.
Or not?
Well, for Noguchi, when we get angry, we do it with ourselves . According to the author of the law of the mirror, there are four reasons why anger manifests in us.
What anger tells us about us
The first is Equality . Sometimes the attitudes against which we react so much are behaviors that we ourselves possess. Our unconscious does not react well to see that image reflected in the mirror of life . Anger is thus a way of defending oneself and differentiating oneself from what is being observed.
The second is that of the Contrariety . The author of the law of the mirror tells us that just as the first situation occurs, the opposite reaction also indicates our own image. We are so accustomed to identifying ourselves with some attitudes that we consider positive, that the contrary behavior makes us exaggerated . This occurs in this way because it questions the identity that we ourselves have built, and that triggers the defense mechanism.
In addition, the third reason according to the law of the mirror has to do with our attitude towards third parties . This occurs when an attitude that a person is having with us reminds us of the same attitude when we have it with another person and that dislikes us. In this case it bothers us that they remind us of our own bad attitude .
The fourth reason is Idealization . As the law of the mirror tells us, in this case the anger wakes up because the image that the mirror returns to us does not match the way we would like things to be. That disappoints us, shows us our mistake and forces us to deal with the frustration of not meeting our expectations. We refuse to accept reality .
The importance of forgiveness
The law of the mirror tells us about the importance of forgiving those people to whom we hold grudges throughout our lives. He who cannot forgive lives tied to the past, and with a heart full of anger towards another person. That way, you will never achieve inner peace.
In this way, forgiving also becomes an act of love with oneself .
It frees us when we understand and accept our wounds. We must, therefore, begin by forgiving ourselves.
Only in that way will we achieve happiness.
AUTHOR: Lucas, editor of the great family of HermandadBlanca.org
SOURCES:
- 'The Law of the Mirror', by Yoshinori Noguchi
- https://lamenteesmaravillosa.com/la-ley-del-espejo-la-regla-magica-solucionar-problemas-los-demas/
- https://www.codigonuevo.com/mileniales/perdonar-alguien-usando-ley-espejo
