21 Ways to Stay in Peace by Byron Katie Summarized by Mary Lynn Hendrix

  • 2010

Introduction

The following practices, simple but powerful, can lead you to contemplate your personal circumstances in a new way, and thus create new possibilities for your personal fulfillment.

1. Invest judgments.

Try to realize when you are judging or criticizing someone for some reason. For example, in the queue of a grocery store, you could get impatient and think that the person in front of you is disheveled and impolite. Quickly reverse your judgment and ask yourself: Is that just as true about me? Am I impolite? (Am I sometimes; with others - or with myself?) Am I rude inside me when I think they are rude?

This exercise removes your attention from the "other" and places it on you. Forgiveness is the natural result. Placing guilt or judgment on someone leaves you helpless to change your experience; Taking responsibility for your beliefs and judgments gives you the power to change them.

Remember, beyond the appearance of who sees before you, it is always God in disguise so that you can meet. Investing judgments allows you to forgive fully. Forgiveness leads to self awareness, and restores personal integrity.

2. The three types of issues.

There are only three types of issues in the universe: Mine, yours, and God's. Whose issue is it if an earthquake occurs? Of God. Whose business is it that your neighbor has a neglected lawn? Of your neighbor. Whose business is it that makes you angry that your neighbor has an ugly lawn? Yours. The inner life is that simple.

Count in five minute intervals how many times you are mentally in someone else's affairs. Notice when you give unsolicited advice or offer your opinion about something (loudly or silently). Ask yourself: "Is it my business?" "Have you asked me for advice?" And more importantly, "can I take the advice I offer and apply it to my own life?"

3. Remain in nobody's business.

After working on the practice of staying out of the affairs of others, try to remain equally out of your own affairs. Don't take anything you think you know about yourself too seriously. "Am I just this physical body?" Is that true? Can I have the absolute certainty that it is true? Why did it happen in maintaining that belief? There is an extended belief that we are our bodies and we will die. Who would it be without that belief?

4. "Detach" from your body / its history

Try talking to yourself for a third time instead of "me" or "me ...".

Instead of saying, "I'm going to lunch, " say, "She's going to lunch, " (referring to yourself), or, "She's going to lunch" "Do this with a friend for an hour, the afternoon, or everything the day. Eliminate the use of all personal pronouns (me, me, us). For example, ”How is this (or this) today? Does he want to go to the park? Impersonally experience the body, the stories, and the preferences you think you have.

5. Talk in the present tense.

Become aware of how often your conversations focus on the past or future. Realize what verbs you use: It was, did, will, will, etc. To speak of the past in the present is to wake it up again and recreate it completely in the present in our minds, and then we miss what is present for us now. Talking about the future is creating and living with a fantasy. If you want to experience fear, think about the future. If you want to experience shame and guilt, think about the past.

6. Scrub the dishes

"Scrubbing the dishes" is a practice to learn to love the action you have in front of you. Your inner voice or intuition guides you throughout the day to do simple things like scrubbing dishes, driving to work, or sweeping the floor. It allows the sanctity of simplicity. Listening to your inner voice and then acting following your suggestions with absolute confidence create a funnier, effortless, and miraculous life.

7. Listen to the voice of the body

The body is the voice of your mind, and speaks to you with physical movements such as muscle contractions - such as tics, pangs of pain, tickling and tension, to name a few. Become aware of how often you take away peace or stillness. Practice stillness and let your body tell you where your mind contracts, no matter how subtle the tension may be. When you notice a sensation, inquire inside, “What situation or thought contracted causes this physical sensation? Am I misaligned with my integrity in this circumstance, and if so, where? Am I willing to let go of this belief or thought that causes this contraction of my body? ”Listen and let the answers guide you, and return to inner peace and clarity.

8. Inform yourself

This exercise can help heal fears and fears. Exercise in informing yourself of the events in which you are immersed as if it were a news event of which you are the reporter.

Find out exactly about the environment and what is happening “on the scene”. Fear is always the result of projecting a recreation of the past in the now or in the future. If you are frightened, find the underlying belief and unleash it: “Is it true that I need to be afraid in this situation? What is actually what is physically happening right now? Where is my body (hands, arms, feet, legs, head)? What do I see (trees, walls, windows, the sky)? ”

Depersonalizing our stories gives us an opportunity to look at the conditions more objectively, and choose our answers for what life brings us. Living in our minds believing in our false thoughts, is a good way to scare us from death, and can appear in the form of old age, cancer, degeneration, high pressure, etc.

9. Listen literally.

Exercise to listen to others in the most literal sense, believing exactly what you hear, and do everything you can to resist falling into your own interpretations of the information they share with you.

For example, someone might praise you by saying that you are very handsome, and you interpret it assuming that the person has some hidden intention. Our interpretations of what people tell us are often much more painful or frightening than what they actually tell us. We can hurt ourselves with our errors of interpretation and our thinking for others. Try to trust that what they say is exactly what they want to say: neither more nor less. Listen well to people. Refrain when you want to finish a sentence for someone either out loud or in your mind.

I listened. It may surprise us to hear what comes out when we allow others to complete their thoughts without interrupting them. In addition, when we are busy thinking that we know what they are about to say, we miss what they really say.

Perhaps you would like to reflect on these questions: What can be threatened if I literally hear and hear? I interrupt because I don't want to really know what they have to say? Do I interrupt to convince them that I know more than they? Am I trying to give an image of self confidence and control? Who would it be without the need to possess those qualities? Is there any fear of appearing unintelligent? Would people abandon me if I literally listened to it, and stopped getting involved in more manipulative games?

10. Speak honestly and literally.

Speak literally. Say what you want to say without justifying yourself, without any desire to manipulate, and without worrying about how you can interpret your words. Practice not being careful. Experience the freedom that this brings.

11. Watch the game

Imagine yourself on a balcony, watching your favorite drama about you and what ails you.

Look at the story in a scenario below. Notice how it has been represented hundreds of times, perhaps thousands. Watch it until you get bored.

Artists have to exaggerate their parts to keep their attention. Notice when your boredom is sincere, get up from the seat, leave the balcony, and leave the theater. Know that you can always visit it again. Who would you be without your story?

12. Watch a second version of the game.

Describe your story from the eyes and mind of another. Write as many different versions with as many different results as you like. Notice what note.

13. Exercise polarity.

If you find yourself emphasizing a negative thought, exercise to go to the opposite positive end or polarity. When you find yourself slipping back into negativity, choose again to return to positive polarity and be consciously present in your choice; Feel the truth about her.

There is only love, and what does not appear as love is a call in disguise for love. It is your birthright to live in the positive polarity of love and truth.

14. Process of loving oneself.

Make a list of everything you love about someone and share it with them. Then, give yourself away everything on the list. You can also recognize that what you love about someone is equally true in you. Then allow it to be filled to be expressed in your life.

15. Move honestly.

Practice acting and responding honestly. Laugh, cry, shout, and speak according to what is genuinely true for you at all times. Be a child again; Act in total sincerity with your feelings. Do not allow beliefs to compromise. For example, leave a room cleanly without manipulating those you leave with an educated excuse. Live your truth without giving yourself explanations.

16. Ask for what you want - Give yourself what you want.

Ask for what you want, even if you may feel bold or embarrassed. People do not know what you want until you ask. The act of asking is a confirmation of the awareness that you deserve to have what you want. If others are incapable or reluctant to agree to your request, then do what you ask yourself.

17. Awareness of yes.

Identify who is in front of you is you. Beyond all appearances and personalities is the being of goodness, which is you. Remembering your presence in all forms will immediately bring you to the present moment, in respect of the inner fullness of that place. The person before you is an opportunity to meet likewise. The overflowing heart of love and gratitude, humbly saying "Oh yes, this person or situation is here so that I can learn who I am."

18. Self gratitude

For twenty-four hours, stop looking outside to assert yourself. On the other side will be the experience of gratitude.

19. The vain mirror.

If you want to see who is not, look in a mirror. Use it only once a day. Who would it be without his mirror?

20. Beyond justification.

Begin to notice how often you give clarifications or justify yourself, your words, actions, your decisions, etc.

Who are you trying to convince? And what is the story you are perpetuating? Become aware of your use of the word "because" or "but" while speaking. Stop your sentence immediately. Start over Justification is an attempt to manipulate another person; Decide to remain silent and be wise.

21. The gift of criticism.

Criticism is an incredible opportunity to grow. Here are some steps on how to receive and take advantage of them. When someone tells you that you are wrong, horrible, negligent, etc., Say, "Thank you, " either in your mind or out loud to that person. This thought immediately puts you in a space where you can arrange to hear and use the information in a way that can serve you. After the criticism, ask yourself, "Does it hurt?" If the answer is "yes, " then some part of you also believes in it. Knowing this gives you the opportunity to correct that part that you find unacceptable within yourself. If you want to stop being vulnerable to criticism, then amend them. This is the last power to let go of every concept. Going unprotected means that it can no longer be manipulated because there will be no place where criticism can adhere. That is freedom.

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